I’m always looking for ways to explain how my mind works. I once referenced my mind as theorize is right wheel while it’s spinning. The effort it takes for me to slow the wheel down let alone focus on a single thought is challenging. I have become to realize that my routines and rigidities were born out of survival because I literally can’t think back to when I last saw something: all the times I last saw it flash and then I’m spinning again.

Last night I stumbled upon a new analogy. My mind is a series of connect the dots. Sometimes the things I bring up in conversation seem entirely random but in my brain almost all events are loose dots. I connect them however I see fit. This is definitely where my creativity comes from.

The more I meet myself with kindness and curiosity the more accepting I am of my abilities, my limitations and my opportunities to engage with new skills that develop into new habits.

I’m forever trying to explain myself: hello trauma response. The best part of that is my amazing husband who encouraged me not just to explore this analogy more but to write this blog.

My ‘silly little thing’ just for me. And if by chance anyone stumbles upon this and can find anything useful among it, so much the better.

-the hanging on mom experience